October 10th, 2019
Goldfinger, GoldenEye, and now— this is almost too much of a dad joke for me to actually finish— The Villain With The Golden Ear?
Italian luxury designer Gucci has recently made their full-scale, gold ear accessories available for purchase, just in time for… Bond 25? Halloween? Fall? I’m actually not quite sure what the gold clip-on is in time for, but what I do know is that it sure is something!
According to the company’s website, the new accessory— which originally debuted at the designer’s Fall/Winter 2019 fashion show— is inspired by artist Eduardo Costa and his 1966 24-karat gold-work, ‘Fashion Fiction #1’ (published in Vogue USA February, 1968). This barely sort of answers some of my questions, and still, there are so many more.
The earring— or ear-clutch— is sized at 3.1″ by 1.6″, so this is a one-size fits all sort of a thing, however, unlike an adjustable baseball cap, it doesn’t seem like this accessory will accommodate every ear. The piece also comes in either a “left” or “right” design, though it is unclear if one should wear both at the same time. When viewed from the side, it is shown that there is both a bottom and top clip, to which I assume the accessory is meant to attach to both your ear’s upper flap, as well as its lower lobe. The dual-clip feature must guarantee a decent amount of security for those sporting the piece, though the actual weight of the item remains unknown.
Being that my ear holes are wildly oversized, I’ve never been able to enjoy the cool aesthetic of having two white AirPods stick out from either side of my face, and so it’s nice to know that I can now invest in this alternative ear accessory in order to mark my lofty stance in society (the precious metal ornament starts at $350.00). I’ve also been looking for the perfect facial trademark in order to properly convey myself as a world-dominating-criminal-mastermind, if not one of their evil henchmen, so I’d say this is a win-win.
The piece, and others alike, are now available for purchase. And on a technically unrelated note, Bond 25, otherwise known as No Time to Die, will be in theaters April 8th, 2020.
What do you think of Gucci’s latest accessory? Comment below!